


quit playing games (with my heart)

by rocketshiptospace



Category: Shadowhunters (TV)
Genre: Bad Communication, Boyband AU, Drunk confessions, M/M
Language: English
Status: Completed
Published: 2020-11-30
Updated: 2020-11-30
Packaged: 2021-03-10 03:27:46
Rating: Teen And Up Audiences
Warnings: No Archive Warnings Apply
Chapters: 1
Words: 5,367
Publisher: archiveofourown.org
Story URL: https://archiveofourown.org/works/27797713
Author URL: https://archiveofourown.org/users/rocketshiptospace/pseuds/rocketshiptospace
Summary: Jace and Simon are a part of Shadowhunter, an internationally famous boyband. They are also very much in love with each other.
Relationships: Simon Lewis/Jace Wayland
Comments: 13
Kudos: 94
Collections: SHBingo 20-21





	quit playing games (with my heart)

**Author's Note:**

> this is for my bingo square: drunk confessions and solely made possible by my one direction phase.
> 
> enjoy!

It all starts with a scarf.

Actually, it all started a good two years ago, when Simon was on The X Factor with big plans to become The Next Big Thing™, only to be placed in a group with four other boys because they claimed he didn’t have the chops to make it on his own.

Something he was bitter about for approximately 5 minutes. Then he actually _met_ the other boys, and realized that together, they absolutely had to potential to take over the _world_ (something they did, in fact, end up doing).

There was Magnus, who was dizzyingly charming and ridiculously handsome, with a knack for costume and stage design. Meliorn, who besides from having an amazing voice, was very smart, and was great at coming up with fantastic PR strategies. Raphael, who was more reserved, but clearly a great leader.

And then, well.

Then there was Jace.

To say Jace and Simon did _not_ get along was putting it very, very mildly. Simon is not even sure _why_ him and Jace disliked each other so much, though he’s pretty sure it has at least something to do with the first time they encountered each other, a band meeting during which Jace mistook Simon for a PA and quite rudely dismissed him.

And thus, a lifelong rivalry was born.

Meliorn claimed that inner band fighting was bad PR and so they played it up for the camera’s, pretending they actually got along on stage, and going back to glaring at each other and making rude remarks the second the cameras turned off.

It had toned down a bit, over the past two years. It had been so long, and outright hating each other took so much energy, energy that could be better spend on their careers, so they eventually settled on severe dislike and left it at that.

Which brings us back to the scarf.

Simon loves being in an internationally famous boyband, he really does. But today had just been a really long day of filming a music video. They started early in the morning, filming some scenes in a grand mansion, and now they are out in the woods, shooting some aesthetically pleasing campfire scenes.

Which is fine, in theory. It looks great on camera, or whatever. But it is also the middle of December, and Simon is freezing his absolute ass off. It doesn’t help that they just finished filming the group scenes, and now all that is left are some head shots. And since they can only film one head shot at a time, Simon is left standing next to the blasted campfire, trying to get some feeling back into his fingers.

He looks around, seeing if there is someone to share this misery with. Raphael is currently filming a head shot, Meliorn is talking to the director about something, and Magnus is shamelessly flirting with Alec, their PA, who is trying really hard to do his job and _not blush_. The only person not accounted for is-

“What’s up, nerd.”

Jace.

Simon rolls his eyes, “Nerd, really? That’s the best you can do?”

Jace shrugs. “Covers the basics.”

“Sure,” Simon says, turning away from him. “Whatever. Can’t you go bother someone else?”

“But bothering you brings me so much joy,” Jace says, grinning. “It’s the highlight of my day, really.”

Simon snorts. “You’re a world famous singer, you are worth billion of dollars, you can do whatever you want, and yet. Your favorite pastime is bothering me.”

“None of my Ferrari’s get as beautifully flustered as you,” Jace says. Suddenly he unwraps his scarf from around his neck and slings it around Simon’s. “Here, you seem cold.” And with that, he walks off, leaving a slightly flabbergasted Simon behind.

(And yeah, maybe he snuggles into the scarf a little. Sue him. He’s cold, okay. That’s all it is.)

\--

That should have been the end of it, really. Except, he should have known with these kinds of things it never is. It’s his own fault, too. He should have taken the goddamn scarf off immediately. Hell, he shouldn’t even have accepted it in the first place. He should have chucked the stupid thing right back at Jace’s retreating back. Thrown it into the fire, anything. At least then he could have forgotten all about it.

But no, instead he is forced to look at multiple fan tweets, links to blog posts, hell _whole YouTube videos_ with theories about how him and Jace are dating. All because he forgot to take it off and was still wearing the stupid scarf during the headshots. And since there’s also shots in which _Jace_ is wearing said scarf… Well, one and one is two (for most fans at least, it seems).

Okay, so no one is _forcing_ him to look at these posts. But it’s like watching a car crash, he can’t seem to look away. Some of the posts are extensive, too. Not only talking about the scarf moment, but also about other little moments from concerts and meet&greets and interviews. There’s countless of pictures of Simon staring longingly at Jace, of Jace throwing an arm around Simon and smiling, of them giggling at each other on stage.

Simon knows that all those moments are for show. He _knows_ that. It’s how him and Jace have been operating for years. Make snide remarks to each other off stage, pretend like they’re the best of buds on stage. This isn’t _new_ to Simon. Yet, even _he_ starts to doubt their true intentions when he is looking at those pictures. They do look _awfully_ cozy.

“Did you know there’s people that think me and Jace are dating?” He asks Magnus, later that day. They’re hanging out in the back of their tour bus. Raphael and Meliorn are napping in their bunks and Jace is off somewhere writing songs.

Magnus doesn’t look up from his phone. “Of course there are. People think everyone is dating nowadays. There’s probably also people that think _we_ are dating.”

He’s not wrong. There’s plenty of people out there that are somehow convinced Magnus and him are a thing. Simon _knows_ this. He has seen the posts. So why does the fact that people think him and Jace are dating bother him so much?

_‘Because you so desperately want it to be true_.’ A voice in the back of his head whispers. A voice he resultely tells to ‘ _Shut the FUCK up_ ’ because it’s not _helpful_.

God, why can’t his life just be simple for _once._

He turns to Magnus to tell him this much, but Magnus is still attentively scrolling through his phone. From the smile on his face, he’s texting Alec. Which means it will be impossible to get anything useful out of him for the next hour or so.

So instead he decides he needs to clear his mind, stretch his legs, get some snacks. Maybe find Jace’s stupid scarf and smother him with it.

\--

Instead of snacks, or a clear mind, or the godforsaken scarf, he finds Jace himself, in the seating area at the front of the bus. He’s lounging on one of the couches, guitar in hand, softly playing a tune Simon hasn’t heard before and humming some words Simon can’t pick up on.

“What are you up to?” Simon asks, desperately trying to sound friendly.

It clearly doesn’t work, because Jace puts down his guitar and narrows his eyes. “Why do you care?”

Simon sighs, “Christ man, just trying to show interest.” He goes to sit down next to Jace, trying to take a peak into Jace’s song writing book. “What are you working on? A new song?”

Jace quickly snatches the notebook away, “None of you business.”

“Isn’t it?” Simon asks, frowning at Jace, “Last time I checked I was part of this band, too.”

Jace sighs, sounding frustrated. “Just, don’t worry about it okay. It’s not. It’s not good. I can’t seem to… Forget it. It’s just not ready. I will show it to you when it’s ready. Now, what do you want?”

Simon understands the que to drop it, and decides for the piece of the bus to do just that. “Can’t I come in here to socialize with my favorite member of Shadowhunter?”

Jace squints at him. “No.”

“Fine,” Simon says, getting up and heading for the cabinets that hold their snacks, “I was looking for food.”

Jace hums, and grabs his guitar again. “There’s a packet of sour cream and onion chips in the upper left corner. You like those, right?”

“Nice!” Simon says, excitedly, and goes to grab the chips.

With his back turned, he doesn’t notice the fond smile on Jace’s face.

\--

Here’s the thing. It’s not that Simon wasn’t aware Jace existed before. But it’s like he’s _hyper_ aware now, constantly keeping Jace in the corner of his eye, constantly anticipating what he’s going to do, constantly searching him out. It’s like all these posts and rumors about them dating dialed his ‘Jace awareness’ up by a hundred, and it’s _terrible._

It’s even worse on stage.

See, in theory, Jace and Simon’s stage truce works fine. But ever since Simon was pointed out that ‘hey, sometimes when you are on stage you kind of act like a couple’, he’s absolutely lost it, going as far as _physically running away_ _from Jace_ during a show one night. He just saw Jace walking towards him, with that devilishly beautiful grin on his face, and _booked_ it. Jace simply rolled his eyes, but didn’t mention it afterwards.

The internet, however, _does_ mention it. Simon can’t help checking his phone after every show now, scrolling through the ‘jimon’ tag on various social media sites, just to see what fans have to say. Some are still convinced they are in love, but most seem to notice that something is going on. Especially the running away moment, filmed by 100’s of fans from a 100 different angles, gets a lot of speculation.

Simon sighs deeply. It’s frustrating, especially because he doesn’t understand why he is so bothered by this. Like Magnus said, people ship him with _everyone_. Heck, he even saw some posts of people who shipped him with Harry Styles, all because they had a five minute conversation at an award show one time.

But this is _Jace_. And Simon _hates_ Jace. Well. Strongly dislikes him. Prefers not to have him in his presence. Could do without him. Maybe. Maybe not.

Simon screams into his hands. This situation is asking for reinforcements. He picks up his phone and dials the only person he thinks can help him with this particular problem. “Clary, I think I might have feelings for Jace,” he says, the second his best friend picks up her phone. He holds his phone away from his ear while she laughs loudly.

“God, you’re a hoot. What made you realize?” She says, when she’s finally calmed down.

“Well,” Simon says, then pauses. “Wait, what do you mean _what made you realize_?”

Clary snorts, “You’ve clearly been in love with him forever, Si. I see the way you look at him.”

Oh, great. Even his best friend is analyzing his love life now. How is he ever going to figure this out if everyone keeps telling him how he’s supposed to feel? Does he even like Jace? Or does he like the idea of liking Jace? Does he like the way Jace looks at him in those pictures, in those second snapshots where he doesn’t frown at him. Does he like the _idea_ of liking Jace or the actual person? God, it’s all very confusing.

He tells Clary as much.

“Oh, honey,” she says. “Hey, my next art gallery opening isn’t for like another two months, and I have enough pieces lined up that I have a bit of breathing time. I could come join you on tour for a bit?”

And that is how shit goes from bad to worse.

\--

See, Clary is a gem. A beautiful, wonderful, very likeable person. So that’s why it’s really not that weird that when she and Jace go to coffee after a few days of her joining the tour (Simon couldn’t come along because he was finally getting somewhere with the song he’d been working on for months) the rumor mill immediately starts acting up.

And it starts acting up _hard_.

“Apparently we’re getting married in the spring,” Jace deadpans, reading an article on his phone. They’re all huddled together in the lounge area of the tour bus during one of the few quiet moments they get.

“Really? I heard news of a winter wedding. They said it was perfect for you general gloomy mood,” Meliorn says, before getting slapped in the face with a pillow by Jace. “I’m just letting you know what the people are thinking, don’t blame me.”

“Well, the people are stupid,” Simon says, rather aggressively scrolling through his phone. All this talk about Jace and Clary getting married is making his stomach churn and he _hates_ it. There’s really no doubt about it anymore, he’s in love with Jace. It’s the only thing that can explain the urge to puke he feels every time someone mentions how in love Jace and Clary seem.

Plus him and Clary talked about it, the first night she joined tour, and made him see the light. Or made him see the dark, really, because as it turns out being in love with Jace _sucks_ So far it’s been a lot of pining and watching him date other girls. Well, watch gossip magazines claim he’s dating other girls. Which is _worse_ because the gossip magazines have never speculated _him_ and Jace are dating. That’s only a handful on fans on the internet.

And now he’s just being pathetic. Great.

“Oooooh, this one is talking about how many children you’ll have! That’s preposterous, we all know Jace _hates_ children.” Magnus frowns at his phone.

“Hey!” Jace pipes up, “I don’t _hate_ children.”

“You’re just terrible with them,” Raphael chimes in. “Remember that one little girl at the concert in Rome that you made cry because you told her you were never going to see her again?”

“I was just managing her expectations!” Jace exclaims, throwing up his hands.

Meliorn snorts. “In that case you need to work on your management skills.”

“Hey,” Clary whispers, nudging Simon, who’s been quiet this whole time. “Don’t you want to join in? You usually love making fun of Jace.”

Simon gives her a look, and she drops it. Magnus, however, does not.

“Careful, Lewis, people are going to think Clary’s cheating on Jace with you,” he says, clearly jokingly referring to the way they’re whispering together, but it’s the last straw for Simon.

“I’m going to have a nap,” he says, through gritted teeth, and all but storms out of the room, leaving his confused band members behind.

\--

Jace corners him after the show that night, which is very unfortunate, because Jace after a concert is one of Simon’s favorite versions of Jace.

There’s just this twinkle in his eyes when he’s just finished performing, that lights up his whole face. It’s like there’s electricity buzzing under his skin, because he can’t seem to sit still, but he also can’t stop telling everyone how great they did. It’s a side to Jace he doesn’t get to see very much.

Plus he’s usually very sweaty, his shirt clinging to his biceps and _god_ is that doing things to Simon’s brain right now.

“What,” Simon squeaks, when Jace grabs his arm and drags him into a supply closet.

“Listen, about this thing with Clary,” Jace says, when the door has closed behind them. He sounds pained. He’s also approximately three centimeters away from Simon because the supply closet he picked is _miniscule_.

“Don’t worry about it,” Simon says, trying to remind himself how to breath. “It’s fine, I totally get. You like her, everyone does. So if you wanna. If you want to go for it, that’s. That’s okay.”

Well, that’s one of the worst things he’s ever had to say.

But he _gets_ it, he really does. He’s been friends with Clary long enough to know how great she is. It’s only logical any boy she meets is going to fall for her. It’s a bit of a shame that in this case that boy is the one Simon recently discovered he’s madly in love with but like, you can’t have everything in life.

Besides, it’s not like he’s going to say no. Clary is her own woman who can make her own decisions and he’s not going to get between that. If Jace want her, there’s no hope for him anyway. 

“But,” Jace is frowning, “But, you?” He sounds confused too, which Simon guesses is fair. He was probably expecting the ‘you hurt my best friend I hurt you’ speech.

“Clary can deal with her own shit. You hurt her, she’s very much capable of breaking all of your fingers and using your balls as Christmas ornaments. She doesn’t need me to give the whole ‘you hurt her’ speech. Just. Be good to her, okay? She deserves the world.”

Jace’s frown deepens. “Simon, I thought you were-“

“Really, it’s fine. I’m not mad. Just, I kind of. I’m going to leave now. I kind of really. I need to breath.” He rambles, reaching for the door handle, and missing it twice before finally being able to swing the door open. Only to find Clary standing on the other side.

“There you are!” She says cheerfully.

Despite all the things he said about wanting the best for Clary, he can’t look at her right now, can’t talk to her knowing the man he’s in love with wants her instead. So he runs past her, mumbles something about needing a drink, and disappears into the night.

\--

The drink was, maybe, a bad idea. Or, well. The first one probably wasn’t. The second, third, fourth, and however many came after that definitely were. So now he’s drunk, in the VIP section of a club somewhere, with no possible means of getting home. He’s not even really sure how he got here, or where here is, or where their hotel is. All he knows is that he’s drunk as shit, and still he can’t stop thinking about Jace, which makes this whole drunken escapade utterly useless in the first place.

Jace, with his beautiful eyes and his captivating smile and his _ridiculous_ biceps and his whole standing right in front of Simon and oh my god is Simon starting to hallucinate?

“Simon? Simon!” Jace says, grabbing Simon’s arms. “Simon, look at me, are you okay?”

“’M fine,” Simon slurs, leaning against this Jace hallucination. It’s surprisingly sturdy, for something that is not actually there. And yet, very soft. Simon gently caresses the hallucination’s cheek.

“Okay, you’re drunk,” Jace says, swatting Simon’s hand away, “You are _very_ drunk.”

“Hmm, yes,” Simon says, stumbling as Jace tries to guide him towards the exit. “Because of you, you know? Because I love you but you love Clary.”

Simon nearly falls over when Jace abruptly comes to a halt. “What?” He says, an odd look on his face.

“It’s okay, I can tell you because you are fake. And you love Clary. Which makes me sad.” Simon plants his face into Jace’s shoulder. “Soft, so soft,” he mutters.

“I… What? Simon, what do you mean?” Jace asks, sounding near desperate.

Simon doesn’t respond. He’s fallen asleep.

\--

When Simon wakes up, the world is way too bright and his mouth way too dry. It takes him a minute to figure out where he is, but he’s surprised to find it’s his own hotel room. He has no recollection of coming back here last night, only of a lot of booze and some sort of Jace hallucination.

God, he’s a mess.

The first thing he does, understandably, is call Clary. Which means that not even five minutes later there’s a knock on the door.

“Good morning sunshine,” she says, walking into the hotel room. “How are you feeling? Jace mentioned you were _pretty_ drunk last night.”

Simon blinks at her. “Jace what now.”

Clary stares at him. “Simon,” she asks, carefully, “do you remember what happened last night?”

Simon groans, and falls back into the pillows. “I got way too drunk, hallucinated about Jace, and then somehow, magically ended up here. Do you know how I got here?”

“Oh, Simon,” Clary says, sitting down on the bed next to him. “Are you sure that hallucination was an _actual_ hallucination? Because, eh, well, the version of the story I’ve heard is that you drunk dialed Jace, yelled some unintelligible stuff at him and then hung up. Jace got Alec to figure out where you were and then he rushed over there to bring you back home. You were drunk out of your mind.”

“Oh my _god,”_ Simon says, burying his face in his pillow. “Are you kidding me? That is the _worst_. He’s never going to like me now.”

Clary hums noncommittally. “Do you remember what you said to him?”

“No,” Simon says, miserably. I barely remember anything. I mean, I thought the actual human Jace I talked to was a _hallucination_. I clearly wasn’t in a great spot. Why, should I go apologize to him? Oh man, I totally said weird shit I should apologize for didn’t I? God, where’s my phone.” He digs his phone out from under his blankets.

“Wait, Simon, I don’t-“ Clary starts, but Simon interrupts her.

“You’re right, I can just go see him, he’s right across the hall, thanks Clary,” he gets up, kisses Clary’s cheek, and leaves his hotel room dressed in yesterday’s clothes.

\--

“Simon,” Jace says, when he opens the door, “hey.” He sounds friendly, which is weird, and also _definitely_ means he said something stupid last night. Why _else_ would Jace suddenly be friendly to him? God, he probably feels _pity_ because Simon is such a giant mess. This is the _worst_.

“I am _so_ sorry about what I said to you tonight,” he says, figuring its probably better to pretend he actually knows what he said to avoid coming across like even more of an idiot. “I didn’t mean any of it. It’s just been a really long and confusing week, and I figured it would be a good idea to get drunk to get my mind off things. But clearly it was a terrible idea. So yeah, I’m sorry.”

Jace’s face closes down. “Right. Okay. Sure.” He seems angry, somehow, and Simon’s not really sure how to handle it. Clearly he said some weird shit right now, so why isn’t apologizing for that helping?

“Thank you, though. For getting me home and everything.” He eventually says, when Jace just sort of… _glares_ at him.

“Yeah, sure. Anytime,” Jace says, and then promptly slams the door into Simon’s face.

Well. At least that is back to normal.

\--

Except back to normal is _terrible._ It’s like something has officially snapped between Jace and him, like Simon’s drunken escapades was the straw that finally broke the camel’s back. They barely interact on stage anymore, let alone off stage. Simon’s pretty sure Jace hasn’t even _looked_ at him for like, four days. He’s not sure what he’s done wrong, because he still can’t remember anything he’s said, and it makes him feel _terrible._

And the fans are catching on too. Not even solely the once that ship Jace and Simon, but like, _all_ of them. There’s rumors flying around about a band break up, there’s articles about inner band schisms, and there’s thousands of social media posts trying to investigate _why_ there seems to be such a hostility between Simon and Jace all of the sudden. Fans are asking them if they’re okay at meet&greets, or tweet them asking if they’re still friends.

In the middle of all of this is Simon, feeling terrible weighed down by it all. He _wants_ to fix what is going on between him and Jace, he really does, but he doesn’t even really know what he did wrong and Jace won’t _talk_ to him.

His bandmates aren’t helpful either, all three of them saying this is between them and they should solve it themselves. Which, they are not _wrong_ , but he just doesn’t know _how_.

So it goes on. And on. And on. Even after they’ve finished their tour and are back in the study to record their third album.

And that’s when things _finally_ start looking up.

\--

Shadowhunter’s general writing and recording process is kind of messy. They all believe in equal input, which means everyone is writing and producing songs left and right. Which means that sometimes, Simon won’t get to see a song until it’s time to actually record it and he gets shoved into a booth with a piece of paper and a ‘good luck’.

This particular song is written by Jace, and according to Raphael it’s a ‘must hear’. Which is terribly high praise for Raphael, so Simon believes him immediately. Raphael’s with him right now, guiding him through the music and the lines, and which parts are his.

Jace, unsurprisingly, is nowhere to be seen. Somehow, despite being _in the same band_ , he’s managed to avoid being in almost any room Simon is in.

Magnus and Meliorn are there, however, lounging on a couch in the corner, watching Raphael and Simon work. Magnus has actually put his phone away for once, though Simon is pretty sure that has mostly to do with the fact that Alec is in and out of meetings all day and won’t be able to text back anyway.

“This is _sad_ ,” Simon says, when Raphael has finished explaining the general concept of the song to him. “Someone telling you they love you and then they take it back like it never happened? Is Jace okay?” He means it jokingly, but it has far from the reaction he expects.

Instead of laughing, Meliorn and Magnus look pained, and Raphael throws up his hands in clear frustration. “Are you _kidding_ me, Lewis? For the love of god, you CANNOT be _this_ dense.”

“Uh,” Is all Simon manages to stammer out, before Raphael barrels on.

“Weeks! Weeks of this _nonsense_ and all those idiots have to do is talk to each other. I have _had it_!” He turns to Simon, shoving the lyric sheets into his hands. “It’s about you, you absolute dumbass. They’re _all_ about you, all of that angsty bullshit Jace writes. They have _always_ been about you!”

A stunned silence falls over the room, and Simon can all but stand there and try to process what he’s hearing.

“I thought we weren’t going to tell him,” Magnus pipes up, eventually.

“I know,” Raphael says, “But I’m so _tired._ I can’t take any more of these mopey love songs.” He points at Simon, rather aggressively. “Do something about it, _please_.”

“Right,” Simon says, trying to get his brain to stop swirling and make words. “Right, yes, uh. Yes.”

And then he walks out of the room.

\--

The memories come flooding back now, finally. About that drunken night. How Simon told him he was in love with Jace and then the next morning told him to forget about it. He feels terrible, for making Jace feel terrible, but _ecstatic_ at the same.

Because if Jace was upset about Simon not being in love with him that means… That means…

Oh my _god._

Simon better pull a Very Big Grand Gesture Of Apology and Love out of his ass, and _fast_.

\--

Simon’s skills include talking a lot, eating a ridiculously large amount of sour cream and onion chips in one sitting, and crying at Disney movies.

All completely useless when planning a grand gesture.

Another thing he is good at, however, one thing that has always helped sort his thoughts, is writing songs. So he does exactly that. He writes night and day, in between recording sessions, in bed, over breakfast. He pours all of his feelings and apologies and love into his writing, and in the end, he comes out with a singular song that capsulates all of that.

And then he actually manages to convince the other boys to let him perform it during their next gig. Without telling Jace, of course.

They get on stage, and Simon’s pretty sure he’s never been more nervous. Not even when he was auditioning for X Factor all those years ago. He’s shaking like a leaf, and he wonders if it’s too late to drop out. But then he looks to his left, towards Jace, and realizes it’s all worth it, if he can make that boy smile tonight.

Halfway the show, Simon sends a sign to the tech guy, and suddenly the music stops, the lights turn off, and the spot turns on Simon.

“Hello New York!” He hollers, and their fans scream. “I have something very special prepared for you tonight!” They scream even louder, something Simon did not think was possible. “I wrote this song for someone who is very special to me, and if the other boys let me, I would like to perform it for you tonight. Solo.” Their fans scream again, and he nods at the boys, who nod back.

All but Jace, who seems rooted on the spot and utterly confused.

Simon decides it’s probably better if he _doesn’t_ look at Jace and instead starts singing.

And for one magical moment, all that matters in the world is him, Jace, and this song.

But then the song ends, and the sound of fans screaming returns, and the boys start small talking with the audience, and the gig continues. Simon tries to make eye contact with Jace, tries to see what his reaction is, but he refuses to look at Simon. If anything, he looks… upset?

Simon doesn’t know what to make of it, but he doesn’t have time to worry about it right now, as they launch into the next song on the setlist.

\--

After the show he finds Jace, and pulls him into a nearby supply closet in a moment eerily similar to the one a few weeks ago, when Jace was the one to pull him into a closet. Jace’s face is closed off, and Simon feels like his stomach is going to explode with nerves.

“So,” he says, when they’re finally squished together in the tiny closet. Simon can feel Jace’s breath on his face and it’s _ridiculously_ distracting. He’s close enough to kiss and Simon wants to _so badly_. “What did you think?”

Jace looks away, refusing to meet Simon’s eyes. “It was nice.” Is all he says.

“Oh,” Simon says. This wasn’t really the reaction he was expecting. Does this mean Simon has got it all wrong and Jace doesn’t reciprocate his feelings after all and he’s gotten it all wrong?

“I bet Clary will really like it,” Jace continues, and _what?_

“What?” Simon asks.

Jace shuffles uncomfortably. “The song. I bet Clary will really like it. You wrote it for her, didn’t you? That was what you were trying to tell me the night you got super drunk. That you were in love with Clary. Except you were drunk as shit and you messed up the names. It’s fine. I mean it’s not, not really. But like. I won’t get in your way. You can have her.”

Simon blinks. “You goddamn _idiot_ ,” he says, making Jace finally look at him. Granted, it is to frown at Simon, but hey. Baby steps. “The song wasn’t about Clary, you dumbass. And I didn’t misspeak that night. I’m in love with _you_.”

This time it’s Jace’s turn to say, “oh.”

“Yeah,” Simon says. “Oh.” And then he kisses Jace.

\--

(“Oh thank _god_ ,” Raphael says, when they walk into the studio the next morning holding hands.

Magnus hums. “I wouldn’t be too happy if I were you. All this means is that we’re moving on from angsty ballads straight into mopey love song territory."

“Some might argue that’s even _worse_ ,” Meliorn pipes up.

Raphael lets out a strangled noise.)


End file.
